The first episode of Star Trek: Very Short Treks, a love letter to Star Trek: The Animated Series takes us into an exponentially insane shroom trip. Yes, we know that Sarah said Kirk a hundred times when it’s just Captain Basic White Guy.

Sarah and Allie slip on some armbands and kick march around the studio… No, I’m not doing this. I refuse to put swastikas on our cartoons and there’s no good jokes to write here about this literal Nazi episode of Star Trek: The Original Series. Listen to this episode, punch a Nazi, and learn from history.

It’s the 1-year Anniversary of Humanist Trek! Allie and Sarah’s bodies are taken over by ancient aliens that may be our great great great grandparents, Dr. Pulaski’s excited to host an alien katra, and Nurse Chapel finally gets Spock inside her. OH MYYY.

When Kirk and company discover the Klingons providing arms to one side of what used to be a peaceful planet, we’re reminded of the many times the USA has gotten itself involved in wars across the globe. Is it right to step in and maintain equal firepower–and where does that end?  You say Gumato, I say Mugato. Let’s call the whole thing off.

Sarah and Allie board the Magic School Bus and shrink down to microscopic size. As the bus penetrates a giant space amoeba’s boundary… actually, maybe this is all too dirty to make jokes about a kid’s TV show. Join us as we blast some antimatter inside a nucleus. Seriously, did these writers know what they were doing?